It is funny (It is not funny. It is sad.) how everyone wants to see naked pictures of women, but nobody wants there to be real, living, breathing, feeling, thinking human beings behind those photos. Pictures are just supposed to spring out of a void, but oh my god, should there be an actual identity behind that picture of a naked woman? GASP. HORROR. HOW COULD SHE.
That’s what bothers me as well.But then, I can’t simply ignore the fact I’m also one of those guys who consumes pornography—either implicitly or explicitly.
Wish I’d be more wise.
There is a huuuuge difference between having attraction and sexual fantasies about someone and actually objectifying them.
Sexual attraction/fantasy: Feeling attraction towards someone and thinking sexy thoughts about them for your own arousal and private gratification. TOTALLY FINE!
Objectification: Dehumanizing a person because you find them attractive, seeing them as purely a sex object there to gratify you and feeling entitled to them without respect for their own wants and needs. NOT COOL!
So yeah, watch porn and feel aroused by sexy people, that is human and nothing to feel ashamed of.
Ask yourself: When you see a sexy person (in real life or in porn), do you feel entitled to have actual access to their body? If you were to speak with them, would you act respectful? If they were to reject your hypothetical advances, will you behave graciously or like a jerk? I hope it’s obvious which behavior is objectifying.
It all comes down to this: Remember that the people you find attractive are whole human beings. Appreciate your attraction and the masturbation material they provide, but behave respectfully to them in real life (including talking about them online).
Enjoy your porn! And then when you’re done, take a moment to be thankful those performers are people who made porn for you to enjoy.